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Flash Fictions
Entrance Exam
There is a test everyone takes when they turn five. It's not a standardized test, where kids learn the valuable skills of choosing letters and coloring circles. Nor are they stretched between opposing monster trucks to measure juvenile tensile strength. The test consists of exactly three questions asked on your birthday. The questions differ from person to person, and are most often asked unknowingly by people you know. You might be wondering how you can prepare your young genetic link, or why plastic melts so easily. In the sixties it was hip to coach the children to answer fourteen and a birdbath to all questions on their fifth birthday, but the unseasonably high number of demonic cults that resulted have changed this trend. Now in an attempt to curb the life-altering effects of the birthday test, parents are trying temporary vocal cord removal surgery. This, in conjunction with a lead-based juice diet, seems to be working. Not only have television revenues increased, but the resultant drool/slobber mix has been found to be an effective lubricant for combustion engines and the always summertime fun slip-n-slide.
Raising rabbits is not easy. No, no it's really not. If you get scared, e-mail me and I'll calm you down. Things being what things being.
